Do not get frustrated, these online solution are probably some of the solution id suggest for a Samsung RPTV. Of course we all try to DIY and find free fixes online, many times they work!
Given these statements:
"the lamp hours were at over 23,000. I reset them to 0 and nothing changed" and "no, i haven't replaced anything".
I assume this TV has the original lamp (or the last replaced) still inside it. I think after all that trouble shooting, the next thing to do is remove and physically inspect the lamp, even though it is not necessarily need to be broken to be dead or defective.
If the lamp is shattered, broken, fogged, burnt or in any other way not crystal clear, you will most likely need to replace it. If it looks good you can try unplugging it with the lamp out for over an hour, put the lamp back in, plug in the tv and try it out. If the problem persists I would recommend trying a new lamp first. The symptoms you describe can be caused by a failing bulb. If you check the lamp removed from the set, it should be a Philips lamp for this is what Samsung uses from factory. More precisely this Samsung HLS5087WX uses the BP96-01472A Philips brand bulb, but I can help you find it cheap online from fellow acquaintances.
First check the lamp and let me know how it goes!